Not much time..

I have another 1 and a half months more to be in Japan.

What am I going to achieve?




What am I going to do from now on to make it the best possible experience ever?

Questions questions questions.

Hai! Must challenge! Must win!!!

I don't like this... I don't like this...

Separation sucks!!!! It SUCKS!!! IT SUCKS!!!!

I don't like it at all!!! Get me out of it!!

I hate it! I hate it..!!! *SOB*


*picture courtesy of stickgirl.com

Swine Flu Craze

Traveling traveling traveling.. That's all I do these days. =( I don't want to sound like a spoil brat because I know there are a lot of people in this world that has never sat in an airplane before but..

Boy am I tired of sitting in planes..

All you do is just sit in the small tiny seat which is super uncomfortable (well.. of coz I'm in economy class) and wait for the time to pass. If you're lucky, you get to watch movies if you do long distance international flights by Malaysian Airlines. If you're not, you have to just amuse yourself by looking at other people snoring or babies crying while you wait for the time to pass because you have nothing better else to do!

And you know what is the worst thing these days???

The stupid SWINE FLU!!!! The stupid flu has made everyone so paranoid with all kinds of sickness! People give you the coldest and most scariest glare if you actually dare to cough or sneeze in front of them! God forbid if you try and blow your nose!!!

I have been sick for the past 3 weeks with cough, fever, and cold all at difference times. Maybe I got the swine flu.. who knows but its such a nerve wrecking experience being on the plane and not being able to control yourself coughing.

I mean I'm sorry I can't stop coughing but... its just a cough!!! I wont kill the entire population for god's sake. Dont' you fall sick too?

Argh... people give you the angriest glare! So discriminating I tell you!!!

When we arrive in Pudong, Shanghai airport, there were actually two men dressed in spacemen outfit that came onto the plane and pointed laser guns at us to measure our temperature!!! They wouldn't even let us out of the plane first!!! So what if I got a temperature of 40 degrees? Are u gonna shipped me back to Malaysia without letting me see a doctor?

WTF???

Yeah.. this swine flu case is seriously getting out of hand. Its just a small flu for crying out loud. Plenty of people in the US die of various kind of flu infection every year. Just because this so called pig flu is spreading around the world doesn't give you the authority to treat people discriminatingly! People die of anything! Like crossing the street to go to Starbucks!!! You can die of that too you know!!!

So stop glaring at the poor girl that is coughing non-stop next to you.

What the "F*ck?"

Note: I take no responsibility for the changed behavior of yours and your children's. Read at your own risk.

My diary is no where to be found! Wtf???

Ok.. I'm sorry if you noticed a sudden increase of curse words in here but after living in US for a while, I think I have succumbed to the "bad" culture here. Sorry dad. I do not agree with u that Americans have limited vocabulary that's why they say "FUCK!"

My professor who is a super intelligent guy, uses the word "fuck" once in a while in class too. And he certainly has no limited vocabulary. He is actually known to use bombastic words that nobody understands.

I guess the word "fuck" is used when you just want to express your inner frustration towards random workings of the universe which so happens to choose u and mess you up.

So instead of saying "I'm totally and absolutely frustrated with life right now for playing random games at me and treating me like a particle of sand in a vast desert" I say "Fuck this!"

Instead of saying "I'm so tired with my life right now and I just wanna go back home because I'm horribly home sick,"

I say "my life is fucked up right now.."

So much easier don't you think so?

And people can't be bothered to hear your grandmother's story of how bad your life is right now. The moment you say "my life is fucked up," people immediately nods understandingly and sympatize with you.

I mean, everyone has the same shit as you. What makes you think you have a worst off life than your neighbor? The only thing they want to know is that you're feeling as hopeless as them with all these randomness in life. And everyone is together in this.

Don't get me wrong. I don't use the word "fuck" in every sentence of my daily conversations. Quite the contrary actually. I used to be the girl that frowns upon people that used this awful word. But when used correctly, this word can actually help express your inner frustration towards life in general.

I mean, what's wrong with that? We need a little release once in a while. Nobody is asking you to kill somebody or bang a car..

I am not..

Back to my lost diary. Instead of saying "I can't believe why my pretty diary ,which has only one entry cannot be found in my tiny little room,"

I say "What the FUCK?"

Yup.. That is basically it. Nothing improper about it. The word "fuck" only carries a negative meaning if you give it that. Nothing sexual or discriminating about it. Its just a word. A very useful one indeed. And if used properly, not in every sentence, it can carry lots of meaning.

So everybody now... "FUCK!!!"

My Rockstar Boyfriend

I hate to admit it but I'm really missing on a lot.. =(

Cody has always been really into playing his guitar and recently he has gotten more and more involved with it. Playing with gigs all around bars, joining competition and all. He has his own band where he plays the second guitar. Recently they even performed in a JRock concert at Sunway Pyramid which is basically local bands getting together to play some Japanese songs.

Doesnt' it look grand?

I can't say much about the concert itself because first i wasn't there and second, I'm not really a big fan of punk rock music. Especially Japanese music. I'm all for Japanese culture and I'm even going to Japan for study abroad soon but this side of Japanese is a no-no for me. So no analysis about the songs or the bands here if you're looking for one.

Seeing the final pictures on facebook kinda makes me sentimental. On one hand, I'm really proud of what Cody is achieving. I mean, playing the guitar is his passion and to see him actually gaining some success in his passion makes me really happy for him. I sincerely proud of my little Cody for being so awesome! =)

Look at the audiences!!!

I sound like a proud little mother instead of a faraway girlfriend. =.=




On another hand, seeing the pictures makes me realize how much I'm missing out on a big part of Cody's life. I mean, I'm not a big fan of the music he plays and everything but if its important to him, its important to me too. Urgh.. I sound so mushy don't I? Dad.. don't read this. >.< Haha.. The closest I can get is through pictures on facebook and some youtube videos. I can never be physically there to cheer on Cody or tell him how great (or not so good =P) his performances were.

I know we're leading different lives and I'm glad that we're both doing our best to achieve our dreams but sometimes I wish that we could be physically together to celebrate each other's success instead of blogging on her blog saying how proud she is of her rockstar boyfriend. Lame! =(




What makes it even worst is reading other blog comments regarding the concert. Can you imagine reading some stranger's blog commenting about how cute your boyfriend was? I mean I know my boyfriend is cute and charming and everything (that's why he's my boyfriend!) but.. he's not out for the world!!! He's MINE!!! Wtf!!! =.=

Haha.. beware jealous girlfriend! *big evil smile*

Although I guess if I was really there, I would need to force myself to listen through a whole night of really loud punky rock music. That might not be such a good thing either. Haha.. at least now I have some excuse..

"What darling? You're performing in a concert? Em.. I'm sorry.. There was no available plane tickets on that day..."

No obligations! =)

But seriously though.. I'm really proud of my rockstar boyfriend. Even though I wasn't there to experience the performance, I'm sure you did an absolute great job! I just wished I was there because I will be ur absolute biggest fan!

F*cking long distance relationships!

I hate long distance relationship!!!



When its morning for one person and night for the other!!! Got such thing or not? Where got meaning lidat when you don't even share the same day let alone the same time?





Always being alone even on a gloomy day. I mean what can your other half do to solve your problem when they're all the way on the other side of the earth? Most times, they don't even bother hearing your problems coz they have their own problems to deal with and telling it to you through the phone just takes too much time..




Its like being a lonely duck swimming in a big beautiful pond but no one to share the happiness with.. (Though actually in real life, this little duck has a partner but the day this picture was taken, she was no where to be seen. Maybe they fought or something.)

AHHHH... You think dating for 5 years is easy and we are the perfect couple? Try being us then! You... "don't know anything better" people! Just because we have been going out for ages doesn't mean that its a bed of roses for us. Rather.. I think the problems are even bigger! When you first start dating, everything is sweet and the guy will do anything for the girl. Now.. he would rather die than be caught doing something sweet.

I want romance!!! I want a romantic boyfriend. I hate doing all the work!!! AHHHHH... I'm sooooo tired...

Ok.. I'm being totally unfair here but I'm freaking fed up of being in the other side of the world from my boyfriend. If you can even call him that since we only see each other freaking once a year!!! What the heck!!! How can this be called a relationship???

I hate waiting for the phone to ring hoping that its him calling!!! I don't want to do that anymore!!! I know.. you would answer "then why don't you call him?" Well.. What's the point?

Talk everyday so what? There's only so many things one can talk. Only so many times you can say "I miss you" without it sounding monotonous or meaningless. Only so many times before it becomes a chore or a responsibility that one needs to do to "fulfill" one's obligation!!!


Ahhhh..

*Breathes* I need to have a higher life condition. *Breathes*

At least I don't have to worry about that someone reading this post coz he never reads my blog anyway!

*I just need to concentrate on doing my readings right now and forget about everything!*

Screw long distance relationship!!!

WTF? Getting Old? NO!!!

I'm really dreading Sunday. I know I shouldn't make a big deal I mean.. what's 22 compared to 32, or 42, or even 52 but.. Argh!!! My life is rushing pass me and there's no way for me to freeze time!!!

Birthdays use to be a fun and enjoyable day for me. I look forward to my birthdays weeks in advance because when you're young, you always want to grow older because there are just so many possibilities and opportunities waiting for you when you're supposedly older..

But now.. Argh!!!

Passing the 21 year mark was already hard for me. I was dreading it because this meant that I'm going to now be an official adult. Responsibilities and everything. But at least it wasn't so bad because people put a great deal on the year 21. Not only can you drink legally but there's no place in the world that you can't get into anymore because of your age.

But 22? What so special about 22? It just means that you're getting old and before you know it, you're all old and wrinkle and all alone. I know I know.. you feminist must be scolding me and saying what's wrong with being alone.. Nothing's wrong. Its just I like to be young.. like 20 young. Not 22 young. Urgh.. I'm disgusted with myself. I don't want to tell people that I'm 22!

And you know what's the worst thing? I'm going to Big Bear, which is a ski resort this weekend and they have special lift prices for "young adults." And young adults are 21 and below!!! And 22 and above is considered normal price! =.= Meaning I have 1 day to ski with the special "young adult" price and after that.. I'm done.

Sigh..

He who doesn't calls

He who doesn't calls is a jerk.

He who doesn't reply calls is also a jerk.

I'm done.

A New Beginning..

Obama has won.

The first African American to be the U.S president.

Right this very moment the electoral votes are 297 to 145. (As of 8:38pm it was 338 to 155)

You need 270 to be the President.

The people have changed now. Race and discrimination is no more an issue anymore. People have more goodness that we think.. The human race essentially want peace and equality.

Race doesn't matter now. What is important is the common good of the society.. We have so much hope for this new president now.. I really sincerely hope things change.

First and foremost.. the war in Iraq.. But right of now..

Oh my goodness.... I'm in awed..

I'm shocked..

Update: Obama is wonderful giving speech. So inspiring. I still have goosebumps on me. I was in tears..

Yes We Can!!! Yes We Can!!!

61% of Obama's vote is from the white people! From slavery to the President of United States.
The world is seeing a change now..

And you know what's the best part? More and more young people are coming out to vote now!!! Yay youth!

Election Day!!!

Ooooh.. The big day is finally here.. The day that will change history!!! The U.S Election Day is finally here...

Its so exciting to be part of this craziness!!! Campaigns here and there.. people putting signs on the streets promoting either yes or no to different propositions..

Did you know that there is a proposition that bans gay marriages? If you vote "yes" on Prop 8, means you agree that gay marriages should be ban in California.

Then there is Prop 4 that makes it mandatory for doctors to tell a minor's parents if she undergoes an abortion. This is a tricky question though. On one hand you would definitely want the girl's parents to know about a big issue like this right? But on the other hand, what if the parents are abusive? Or threatening? Such tricky questions..

Then there is also Prop 2 that aims to give better treatment to farm animals.

There are 12 propositions altogether. Californians vote on it together with their presidential vote.

Its gonna be exciting tonight. When the results are shown.

I wonder who will win the election? Some say that Obama will surely win hands down. But there is still a tiny "What if?"

There's the conservative John McCaine.




And the young bold democratic first African American Obama.

I know who I'm rooting for to win. Though obviously I can't vote..




*crosses fingers*

Hopefully the man who we are all rooting for to win will win and make changes he claims to do!

Goodness always prevail

I was browsing through New York times a while ago and I came across this article that brought my attention. I normally am only interested in world news and I was interested in this particular article because the guy's picture was next to the title "Chinese Activist wins Rights Prize."

He looked familiar because I wrote a paper about him last semester in my Intro to Human Rights class. That time, we were given assignments to write our views on a newspaper article. And the article was about Hu Jia, who was arrested because of what he wrote in his blog about the communist government on violation of human rights. I remember writing about how the Chinese government was violating the civil rights of the people by not giving them freedom of speech. I even remember reading about his poor wife who just gave birth at that time and was put into house arrest. Imagine stumbling upon the same guy again and this time, he is winning a prize for his actions.

Good always triump huh!

Too bad the Chinese government isn't happy about this.

Last Post In Malaysia

Sigh.. I can't believe this. My three months of summer holidays is over and I'm leaving for US next Tuesday. Being back in Malaysia has really been wonderful. I have grown to appreciate things that I have taken for granted 20 years of my life. Of course the most important thing is the food but everything else that makes Malaysia my home is something that I know I will never get in other countries.

But I think being in US for almost a year has also made me have feelings for that country too. I don't really know if I can call it my home but I know there's a tiny part in me that kinda misses California too. I have been kinda dreading to go back to US for the past month also. Every time I think about me returning back there, leaving my home Malaysia, it breaks my heart. Every meal I take I'll have to think, "is this the last time I'll be eating this?" "Will I still have any opportunity to come back to this place again?" But after being here for three months, I'm kinda ready to go back to US now.

The hardest thing is leaving Cody though. Sigh.. long distance relationship sucks!!! How do one bear not seeing, touching, smelling or feeling someone that you love for such a long period of time?

Sigh.. own dream versus love.

Why can't one have all?

Bye bye Malaysia

Sex and the City-The awesome Movie!

*spoilers ahead. Venture at ur own risk. Don't say I didn't warn you..*


Oh my god... I can't believe I have finally watched the movie!!! Wooohoo.. after searching online for the perfect clear torrent file, I finally succeeded in downloading it. I knew I didn't want to watch it in Malaysia because I didn't want the censored version.




We all know how much Malaysia censor its movie! Even kissing is a no-no and we're talking about sex and the city here! Did u think it will be clean and pure?

And boy was I glad I didn't watch it in the cinemas. Wahahaha.. I came back to Malaysia before it starting showing in California so I didn't have the chance to watch it there. Even so though, I don't think I will feel comfortable seeing nude scenes with my girlfriends in the movie theaters. If you are a big fan of SATC like me, you will know that the stuff that they discuss in their series are always sex oriented so if they're gonna make a movie, I'm sure they will not sacrifice the one thing that made their show popular, which are sex scenes.

I watched it alone in the middle of the night when everyone was sleeping. It was much more fun doing there. Hehe.. laughing by myself with their jokes. Don't call me a perverted though. =P They actually showed a small peep of a hot Latino package!!!

Wahahaha...

Though I love the show tones, if you're not a fan of the show, I don't think you'll like it. Its basically an "ending" to the series. It starts with a little summary of the past 6 seasons. 5 years has passed and each of the character has grown from where we left them. I didn't really felt like I was watching a movie though, it was just like watching a super long version of their normal 30 minute series. Though it was really nice to see them again after the season finale. You can't help loving these 4 characters and treating them like good friends!

Yup.. somebody is getting married!!!



For the umpteenth time!

The front part was pretty boring. Even for a fan like me. I was wondering when was the climax gonna come. Was there no story line for this show? I think they spent a little too long building up the story. But after the climax, it was interesting. Lots of laugh and tears. Not to mention some hot steamy sex scenes. =)

For all the SATC fans out there.. Have you ever seen Carrie Bradshaw naked? Because come to think of it, all 3 of the characters besides Carrie has been naked before. What about Carrie because I cannot remember seeing her bare it all before. Is it because she's a higher celebrity than the others?

The story line is pretty good though besides the slow build-up. I like how they discussed some reality issues in the movie like "what exactly is marriage?" Do you think just because you're married you don't have to look after your appearances anymore? Do you forgive someone who cheated on you for ONE time and is totally devastated for his/hers action? Is there such thing as "meaningless sex?"

It did make me ponder for a while though. Not to mention the overemphasis on "finding love." They make it sound soo scary. That finding love is the ultimate objective of a woman's life. If you're not married by the age of 40, you're doomed for eternal loneliness.

I guess that's why they have Samantha as a character though. Prove that its okay for a woman to have different sexual experience every other day and be successful at the same time. Basically like a man.

I can't really decide who's my favorite character. I love Charlotte because she's kinda like me. A hopeless romantic. But at the same time, I don't think love conquers all. I still believe in the woman having her own dreams and life too. Though I guess its not wrong if your ultimate dream in life is to marry a wonderful man and have beautiful children.




I guess Charlotte is the perfect model for that.

I love the scene where she hugged Carrie and protected her fiercely from stupid useless Mr.Big. Galfriends are your life!!! And the part where she cursed Mr.Big and pop her balloon. Hehe..

I don't really agree with Miranda too. She's a bit too strong minded for my liking. Always career career and career! What about having fun and loving life? And the way she treats Steve? Poor Steve! =.=

She can be surprisingly hot if she wants to though..

I don't really know what character Carrie plays. She's always hopping from one relationship to the other but always pining for the infamous Mr.Big.




I still can't forgive her for dumping the perfect Aidan. Yup.. I still prefer Aidan any day!

Sigh.. remember him?
They were ALMOST married!

Stupid Carrie.

Her choice of clothes are always fun to watch though!

And her craze for shoes? >.<

I can never understand that. Only woman themselves look at other woman's shoes. Men just can't be bothered looking down at women's shoes. Though I think I don't really have any right to say anything seeing that I just bought 14 tops in 3 days!

Samantha is one interesting character. One that I love to read and watch but don't think I can ever be.

Don't you just lurve her hat?


She goes for plastic surgery, has sex with random guys every other day and wears killer dresses all the time! One thing though, I would love to be able to get into VIP clubs and restaurants with a flick of my hand. Ah.. the sex education we get from Samantha..

And her "falls" once in a while! =P

I'm definitely going to miss this series though. I have to admit I have learned sooo much from this show. From "the rabbit" to gay sex.. Sex and the City is the best guide to sex! I recommend it to any innocent young girls wanting to know more about the forbidden word "sex!"




Boy am I gonna miss them..

I can't stop shopping!

I...... need... to.... go.... shopping......

AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Princess... Shin... can't... go... shopping... a..n..y..m..o..r..e...

Help me guys!!! I really can't do any shopping anymore! I don't have any pictures to show you guys but..

Just the week before I came to Vietnam. Me and Cody went around to Sg.Wang, Sunway Pyramid, and The Curve. And you know how many tops I bought? In just that 3 days, I bought 14 tops!!!! And 3 pairs of shoes!!!!!!!

That's only that 3 days.

What about when I first came back? When I was in Vietnam in June?

I don't even want to count anymore. Its just tooo scary to think. And I only have 2 suitcases! How am I gonna fit everything inside? =.=

I told myself that I have had enough of shopping. I wont shop anymore till I go back to US. Coz I really don't think I can fit everything inside my luggages. Even with I have a max of 23 kg per bag for 2 bags to US compared to one check in bag of 23kg for other countries. BUT..

I discovered this website!!! I din know Cats whiskers has a website too!!!! And I absolutely love Cats whiskers. Besides the random boutiques in Bangsar, Cats whiskers is one of my favorite boutique to shop! And who can say no to sales?

I like the pink top top left

They have 20% on all new items!!!! Can you believe that? I know I know if you're not a shopoholic like me you wont have any feeling hearing that. But.. sigh.. I'm a hopeless shopoholic! And Malaysia is now having their Mega sale. Do you know how great is that?

Sigh.. I love Malaysia. I love Kuala Lumpur. I love Bangsar. I love Sunway Pyramid. And I LOVE Sg.Wang., Pavillion, Curve, One Utama.. Sigh..

Did I miss anything?

Thank goodness I'm not talking about crazy big brands like Dolce and Gabana, Gucci, Coach, Jimmy Choo YET!!! Or else I'll be disown by my family already..

Do you think there's such thing as a rehab for shopoholics like me? I think I'm a little too overboard when it comes to sopping. I can't help it.. >.< Boohooo... I think I need to admit myself to one of those places!

Anyone any suggestions on what I should do? =(

Feeling the blues..

Princess Shin is emo and confused now..

What is love? Why must two people to be together? What does it mean to be in a relationship? Is love eternal? Or is it just a passing phrase? Is there such thing as soul mate, one person in the whole world that fits you? Or can you fall in and out of love easily?

4 and a half years.

What does that mean to you?

The Olympics

Its interesting how much preparation was said to be given towards the 2008 Beijing Olympics and how much anticipation everyone was having towards the 8th of August 2008. It so happen I flew to Vietnam on that day itself so I had access to cable TV to watch the opening ceremony. I read so much about the Olympics that even though I wasn't interested to anything involving sports, I was actually excited to watch it.

With all the controversies surrounding the Beijing Olympics, one wonders how magnificent the opening ceremony would be. China is known for its human rights violation and a lot of people are questioning if it was the right choice to choose China as the next host for the Olympic games. With all these scrutiny, what would China do to prove that they are indeed qualified to host the Olympic games?

What with the recent Tibetan and Darfur issue, China is not exactly in the international community's good books right now. So one wonders what China will do in their opening ceremony, which will be watched by over 1 billion people around the world, to win over the hearts of the people all over the world.

I was kinda disappointed though after watching the opening ceremony. Maybe because there were so much anticipation that people had incredibly high expectations for it, but I wasn't at all awed with the performance. It is undeniable that the costumes were extravagant, colourful, not to mention spectacular. And the scroll was absolutely beautiful, making one wonder how exactly did they do that.

But aside from all that, once you finish watching it, you forget about the whole thing in an instance. And if you notice, the audience were not exactly very responsive either. Most of them had a bored look on their faces busy fanning themselves with their golden fans.

Imagine the amount of money spent on the Olympics! A few million dollars just for that one day!

Though I must give the Chinese thumbs-up for the messages that they try to convey in almost all of their performances. Messages like peace, harmony and non-discrimination of all people were constantly being conveyed throughout the performance. Its kinda ironic though, one moment they are singing the song of peace, and the next they are aiding the Darfur genocide.

How ironical.

That was my personal opinion about the Opening ceremony. What did u think?

Disappointment

Have you ever plan something to its very last detail and all you need to do is wait for the right day to follow your plan when suddenly, everything is all crush?

Not because of someone else or unforeseen circumstances.

All because of your own carelessness. Your very own fault. No one to blame but yourself.

That although somebody else is the whole reason why your plan failed, ultimately it is yourself that is to blame? That your perfect week ahead, or perfect holiday is totally ruined because of one small mistake? And if that mistake didn't happen, if you were not sooo careless, you would be enjoying your perfect week?

Ahh...!!!! My heart is broken to pieces now. And the worst thing is, I cannot be angry at anyone, especially not the person that spoiled my plan, because ultimately, it was my fault. It was me that lead to a change of events. Domino effect. From one single small mistake, to the destruction of my long thought perfect plan.

I know I'm overreacting but..

I'm totally crushed. I'm torn. I'm.. hopeless.

I shall hide in my dark corner for the next few days thinking about my mistake.

A definition of a Home

I know its been a long time since I last truly blog about what I feel. My recent post has been more about updates or just merely picture post. Maybe its because of my busy lifestyle or my brain has stopped producing meaningful stuff, whatever the reason, I apologize for not keeping this blog up to standard. Hopefully I still have imaginary readers dropping by once in a while hopping to catch something interesting from this blog. Though from the looks of it, I think I can post nude pictures for all I care and nobody would notice anything.

Not that Princess Shin would do that! What did u think? =.=

Maybe if I were truly desperate... you never know...

Wahhahah.. ignore me!

Anyway.. I just had an argument with my mum last night. As you guys know, my family has recently moved to Vietnam last August. And before I came back for the summer holidays, I had a big fight with my mum on where to spend my summer holidays. She wanted me to go straight to Vietnam but I wanted to return to Malaysia first. Malaysia is my home and I miss it to bits!!! Not to mention the fact that Cody is there too.. Of course I wanna return to Malaysia first. She went on about how the family is not important anymore and blablabla.. the usual stuff.. making me feel all guilty for not being a filial daughter.

But anyway.. all was resolved and I went back to Malaysia first for 2 weeks and now I'm in Vietnam. But last night, the topic about where is my home came up and I didn't agree that Vietnam is now my home.

She got mad and told me that though its "a hard pill to swallow," Vietnam is my home whether I like it or not. According to her, "home is where your parents are" (I feel like I'm writing a paper), no matter where it is. I don't know about you but I just cannot accept that this foreign place is now my home, even though my whole family is now here.

What exactly does home mean anyway?

People say "home is where the heart is".

What the hell does that mean? Where is the heart?

I always feel that Malaysia is my home. I don't know whether it is the fact that Cody is there or that I really feel Malaysia is my home because I have lived there for 20 years of my life. But to me right now, Malaysia IS my home.

I can set up a family or work in any country in the world, but Malaysia will always be my home.

My brother, who's studying in an international school right now, is starting to lose his Malaysian-ess! Just last week he was asking me what is "wat tan ho" (scrambled egg noodles)! And he keeps putting down Malaysia, saying how low the standard of English is in Malaysia, bla bla bla.. sounding like a spoiled "foreigner". I can't blame him though. He's fifteen right now mixing with all the so called "rich" expatriates! To him, I'm sure Malaysia is not his home anymore. Home is where all his friends are and right now, he has plenty of friends in Vietnam.

Where does that live me then? I'm not back for 3 months in a year. And for that 3 months, I'm torn between staying in Malaysia and Vietnam. This is just my first holiday and I'm sure for the next 3 years, my mum is gonna give me a hard time choosing between Malaysia and Vietnam.

What the hell does home mean anyway?

I AM BACK!!!

Oh my god!!! Princess Shin is back in Malaysia!!! Woohoo!!! Princess Shin is finally back in Malaysia!!! You can't imagine the feeling when I saw Malaysian airliness stewardess in LAX last night. It like home when you see the blue baju kebaya and when I saw The Star in the airplane I almost burst into tears!!! And they even served chicken curry for lunch!!!

But the flight was awfully long!!! 19 freaking hours! What the heck??? It was so tedious! I was practically counting every second before I touched down. We had to stop by Taipei first for 1 and a half hours and we ended up staying for another hour because the fuel tank had problems. And the line to check in at LAX was freaking long too!!! It took me TWO hours to queue up! Crazy! We had to stand in the cold outside the airport because the queue was that long!!! But it was comforting seeing so many Malaysians and identifying Malaysian English accents among them.

Touching down was interesting too!!! Seeing Cody was all weird too. Words can't describe how it felt after not seeing him for almost a year! We were both smilling so hard it hurt! And then we went for lunch!!! It was hard to choose what lunch I wanted for my first meal back in Malaysia. Do I got for Chow Kuew Tiao? Maggi goreng or Indian food? I went for Indian food in the end. My favorite Lotus in Atria. Even the people there asked me where have I been for the longest time! They remembered me! Soo sweet! I used to go there like twice a week!

It was so weird being back though. Part of me feels like nothing has change. That I'm still in high school and everything and I'm just going out for tea with Cody. But I know that lots of things have change. This is not our lives anymore and it kinda hurts thinking about it. Though I love my new environment in US and everything but its sad thinking about my memories.

Ya know what I mean?

Oooh.. the first bite of the dall that I had in Lotus was absolutely amazing. It was so heavenly to finally taste real curry!!! Ahh... orgasm!

I miss Malaysia... and I still love it.. soo much!

Only thing though..

ITS FREAKING HOT IN HERE!

Tragedy strikes again

In the midst of our normal daily problems, people from other parts of the world are facing so much suffering right now. The 7.9 magnitude earthquake that happened in China's southwestern province of Sichuan has now a death toll of over 12,000. It breaks my hearts knowing that while I sit in my comfortable room with a newly bought TV,worrying about my approaching finals, people in another side of the world have lost their homes, families, or may even be in physical danger. It happened at 2pm so most people were in some sort of structure at that time. Especially school children resulting in about 1000 students dead.

Check out this site for some pictures on the China's earthquake. It brought tears to my eyes.

And this happened after the Cyclone that hit Burma on the 2nd and 3rd of May.

How many disasters have to happen in the world?

The death toll in Burma is already 34000 and its expected to be more than 100000.

Regardless of what people say about the Chinese government, rescue efforts were made right after the incident happened. At least the Chinese people are receiving some aids, (whether sufficient or not is another story) compared to the Burmese people. The military junta is reluctant to receive any international aid. One man actually asked where did all those uniformed men that beat him up days before went? Why must governments be so selfish with their actions? Who is going to suffer in the end?

The people are the ones!!!

The world is really making me depressed right now.