Friday, June 20, 2008

A definition of a Home

I know its been a long time since I last truly blog about what I feel. My recent post has been more about updates or just merely picture post. Maybe its because of my busy lifestyle or my brain has stopped producing meaningful stuff, whatever the reason, I apologize for not keeping this blog up to standard. Hopefully I still have imaginary readers dropping by once in a while hopping to catch something interesting from this blog. Though from the looks of it, I think I can post nude pictures for all I care and nobody would notice anything.

Not that Princess Shin would do that! What did u think? =.=

Maybe if I were truly desperate... you never know...

Wahhahah.. ignore me!

Anyway.. I just had an argument with my mum last night. As you guys know, my family has recently moved to Vietnam last August. And before I came back for the summer holidays, I had a big fight with my mum on where to spend my summer holidays. She wanted me to go straight to Vietnam but I wanted to return to Malaysia first. Malaysia is my home and I miss it to bits!!! Not to mention the fact that Cody is there too.. Of course I wanna return to Malaysia first. She went on about how the family is not important anymore and blablabla.. the usual stuff.. making me feel all guilty for not being a filial daughter.

But anyway.. all was resolved and I went back to Malaysia first for 2 weeks and now I'm in Vietnam. But last night, the topic about where is my home came up and I didn't agree that Vietnam is now my home.

She got mad and told me that though its "a hard pill to swallow," Vietnam is my home whether I like it or not. According to her, "home is where your parents are" (I feel like I'm writing a paper), no matter where it is. I don't know about you but I just cannot accept that this foreign place is now my home, even though my whole family is now here.

What exactly does home mean anyway?

People say "home is where the heart is".

What the hell does that mean? Where is the heart?

I always feel that Malaysia is my home. I don't know whether it is the fact that Cody is there or that I really feel Malaysia is my home because I have lived there for 20 years of my life. But to me right now, Malaysia IS my home.

I can set up a family or work in any country in the world, but Malaysia will always be my home.

My brother, who's studying in an international school right now, is starting to lose his Malaysian-ess! Just last week he was asking me what is "wat tan ho" (scrambled egg noodles)! And he keeps putting down Malaysia, saying how low the standard of English is in Malaysia, bla bla bla.. sounding like a spoiled "foreigner". I can't blame him though. He's fifteen right now mixing with all the so called "rich" expatriates! To him, I'm sure Malaysia is not his home anymore. Home is where all his friends are and right now, he has plenty of friends in Vietnam.

Where does that live me then? I'm not back for 3 months in a year. And for that 3 months, I'm torn between staying in Malaysia and Vietnam. This is just my first holiday and I'm sure for the next 3 years, my mum is gonna give me a hard time choosing between Malaysia and Vietnam.

What the hell does home mean anyway?

1 comment:

Nuthriz said...

Well... If I were you, it would sure spur me to somehow get on my own, heh. Human nature realizes itself best in freedom - and suffers facing any significant limitations to it. Maybe Your mom has difficulties somewhere inside coping with all the situation... I don't know.
"Where I lay my head is home", goes the lyrics of one Metallica song. For all our life here's just like a blinking of an eye...